Sometimes good things happen too. Good things happened to Kelsie and I.

We move into our house in two weeks! yayayayayayayayay


We’ve been hearing a lot of “When are you having kids?!”, “Now that you have a house, kids are around the corner!” and my sister in law is pregnant with her third so my family is expectant that we’ll follow suite. I have to say, yet again, not so quick….


I have some concerns with the way I’ve seen people decide to have kids.  

Some do it to save or strengthen their marriage. 

Some do it because they want to get married and it’s the fastest way to a ring on the finger. 

Some do it because they’re bored. 

Some do it because they’re lonely.

Some do it because it’s the “next step”.

Some do it to fit in.

Some do it unintentionally, but I’m leaving that out of this discussion. 

Some do it because they feel it’s God’s command. 


Almost all of those strike me as selfish, and selfish in the way that it’s wrong. 

I believe that raising children successfully and healthily can only be done in a selfless way.

Kelsie and I struggle with these motivators that we so often see exercised. 

As I write this I feel compelled to adopt.  


This world is already deprived of goodness and is only spiraling downward into more sin and more darkness. I cannot at this time choose to bring a new life into this existence, even with the miracle of God’s grace and the Holy Spirit’s divine intervention on the behalf of this new life. I can, though, see us opening our arms and our resources to a life that is here, not by it’s own choice, and is now abandoned by the selfishness of the one who did decide to create it. I do understand the circumstance of parents giving up children when they are not in a position to offer a safe and healthy environment for them to grow. It’s in that circumstance that I see the purpose of the church coming to life. Actually, it’s in that situation that I see the church lacking in it’s purpose.


I lost track of where I was and where I initially intended to go with this, as I so often do, but I’ll summarize.


I won’t have kids because i’ve reached a point in life where I don’t know what else to do.

I won’t have kids because I am bored, lonely, or feel like I don’t fit in.

I won’t have kids because I am disillusioned with the life I live and need to live vicariously through my kin.


If I have kids it’s because I feel like God has called us to.

If I have kids, it’s likely I’ll have adopted them.

If I have kids, it’s because Christ has convinced me that He will be stronger than my failures as a father. 


I know you wanted to know all that 🙂


One thought on “Kids

  1. This is good. Thought about this a lot more. Some people are called to adopt, I wouldnt doubt that they have very similar convictions. As for the selfish statement, it is a heart issue.. and no matter the “selfish” intentions. No parent can remain selfish and have a child who prospers. Their life becomes the prosperity of their children. Ultimately selfless. God will work through all things. No matter what.

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